From HoverCloud

Michael's Early Return

Should Michael return early to our household? Things may not work out for him in the system and it may actually be the system itself that makes it impossible for Michael to succeed well enough there to come back to us. Should we accept him back without the requisite 6 months that we originally decided upon?

Pros

• Michael is not doing well in the system, he is experiencing repeated depression and probably has a lot of abandonment anxiety, that can only be amplified by having him in there and not at home with us
• We miss Michael and would enjoy having him at home, most of the time it is good with him and he is pleasant to be around
• We suspect that he may value our home environment more than before and it might be possible to make more progress with him (especically in the areas of his mental growth) than he can make in the system

Cons

• Michael was so much to handle at home at times that we couldn't do it, in particular, the load on Phillip is heavy because of the emotional roller-coaster he gets to ride when Michael is home, we are not professionals, and there is a limit to how much we can bear
• We just finished patching up the holes and replacing the doors in Michael's room, if he comes back before he has a proper appreciation for his home with us, it's all going to be destroyed again before we're through
• He may not be ready, this might all be a show he is putting on in order to get back home with us, and the cycle of behavior that resulted in him being removed for us will just happen over again, painfully, for everyone, including Michael, making him feel like he failed again
• Phillip and I do not get to spend as much time together because if it is anything like before, we don't like leaving Michael at home alone very much